We've all been there. Engulfed in the countless tasks that surround parenting with the added pressure of holidays, gatherings, and managing other humans. It's hard to pay attention when we're thinking about food prep, nap times, coordinated outfits, perfect family photos, the weather, bugs, sun, and everyone else's good time; just to name a few.
It's easy to get caught up on all the stressors and details of the holidays and neglect our own self care. Unfortunately, when our bodies are under stress, it blocks our ability to be fully present and attend to our surroundings in the moment resulting in decreased ability to encode memories. (Sandi, 2007)
Our memories are stored more successfully when we use as many senses as possible and direct our attention to encoding the details of a particular moment. When we are fully present to see, smell, hear, taste, and feel all the sensations around us in any given moment, we remember more of that moment. However, it's hard to make room for this focus when we may have multiple internal and external distractions interfering with this process.
So, here are a few suggestions to decrease stress on your body, meet your needs, and ensure more vivid memories are made and remembered.
Decorate to your capacity. If you're like me, you may very much dislike decorating. To me it feels like one other task that needs to get done before I can sit down and relax. In a busy season of life, it's low on the priority list and stresses me out. So, I don't do it much at all and I let myself know that that's okay. If you're into decorating, decorate to your hearts desire.
Keep yourself fed and hydrated throughout the day. That means eating breakfast and trying to include a variety of foods throughout the day so you aren't getting too hungry. It can be common to skip a meal if we are planning to go to a party since we anticipate eating a lot there. Our bodies become stressed when we are running on fumes which interferes with our ability to live in the moment.
Point out 3 things you sense around you. Stop what you're doing and notice what is going on around you. For example, you could sqy to yourself, "I hear birds chirping, I see my kid's smiles, I feel the warm breeze."
Delegate tasks. Enlist help to get other's needs met. You likely have family and friends around you during the holidays; use them! Most people in your like would probably be happy to help, they just appreciate direction on what you need.
Brain dump. If you find yourself having a hard time shutting off your brain to everything that might be needing to be done in the upcoming days while at a gathering, keep a list on a piece of paper or your phone of things you want or need to do. That way you can get them out of your head and refocus on enjoying g the moment without worrying you will forget.
Take a quiet moment for yourself. Again, if you're like me, groups of people can get overwhelming. Sometimes slipping away to collect my thoughts and take a few quiet breaths can be vastly helpful for bringing me back yo the present.
It's easy to forget your needs and focus on everyone else during the holidays. However, this may mean you have a hard time fully making the memories you are trying to create. Remember, met needs leads to decreased stress which may lead to more memories made.
Enjoy the holiday!
Sandi, C. (2007) Neural Plasticity and Memory: From Genes to Brain Imaging. CRC Press/Taylor & Francis; 12.-12.3.
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