Most of the time, our social media lives are consumed with images of others' perfect lives. We see accomplishments, professional family photos, romantic getaways, etc. However, despite logically knowing this isn't everything that happens to people, it's tough to not compare your life to what you're seeing online.
I recently heard of people who have published a timeline of failures to show others that they are not the only ones who experience struggles and failures. So this week, I decided to reminisce on times when I've struggled to map out where I've gotten to today.
2001: Tried out for middle school jazz band and bombed the audition. Definitely didn't get an invite to join.
2003: Took the ACT twice and didn't score high enough for the college I wanted to get into. (Thankfully still got in)
2004: Lost most of the high school basketball games I played in.
2005-2008: Didn't get to play in almost any games during college volleyball for three years before quitting prior to my senior year.
2005: Tested into an advanced college Spanish class only to miss multiple assignments because I couldn't understand the teacher and ultimately tearfully withdrew from the class.
2009: Missed graduating college with honors by .01% for my GPA resulting from a class I took freshman year.
2009: Failed my first quiz in graduate school which gave a nice blow to the ego. Despite working harder than any other class on my college career, got a B/C at the end of the semester.
2010: After high jumping for 10 years, my personal best in graduate school was only 1.5 inches higher than I had achieved in 8th grade.
2014: Finished a research project for a stroke rehab certification after 6 courses and an exam and I was told I "missed the mark" on my 40 page write up at the end. (Thankfully still passed after discussing with the instructor)
2020: Gave up my online health coaching job after 5 years.
2022: Struggled with postpartum anxiety and a phobia after having my second child.
Our successes are supported on a foundation of failures. Also, "failures" are really subjective. With different contexts they appear worse or better than we had originally felt at the time.
The experience of writing this post was interesting for me. Instead of feeling sad about things that didn't go well for me, I felt happy because I can directly point out the positive turn my life took after each event.
Also, side note, I believe it's also important to discuss age appropriate struggles with your kids. It's a great teaching opportunity for them to see that we all make mistakes and aren't always successful. They also then get to see how we process through our emotions as a result.
If you're feeling brave, please comment on a struggle or failure that you've had in your life that has pushed you on to something better. Let's all show each other that we aren't that different in the fact that all our lives have had adversity. Some make us a better person and some just are crappy, but you get through it, and a lot of times, they shape the masterpiece than you've become today.
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